friends can have a funny way of precipitating relationships, which is not to say i'm any more involved than i was prior to the weekend, but saturday in some ways was a place i've been before. we went to the birthday party of a person i'd known but not terribly well from random house and who i've since spoken more with thanks to a mutual fondness for karaoke. he's not unattractive and he's newly unattached and it's not unfathomable that there could be some interest there, but i barely know him and so that's as far as it goes.
being with friends who know your history and your internal struggles with the direction(s) of your life, who want you to have happiness or if not that at least distraction, has a way of subtly transforming the above scenario - it introduces the meta-layer of Potentials. the same thing happened in january, i felt like i was being shepherded towards something i wasn't sure i wanted. instead of just getting to know new people and enjoying the company of those i already knew, there was this added expectation that i could/should make a choice or a move. this time, at least, i realized i just didn't want to, not that night at least. it's an experience i think i should hold onto.
apart from internally philosophical moments, the evening was fairly nice. not quite as enjoyable as friday, but i did meet an interesting law student from france who i'll be inviting to some things.
and sunday i indulged in the absorption of seriously crappy movies on tnt. they had some vampire theme going on and i was intending to get more cleaning done than i actually succeeded in doing. i clipped my cat's nails instead and sorted through old magazines. it appears that recasting vampirism as a viral infection is all the rage - or was a few years ago. all the ones they showed spun down to opportunities to capitalize on genetics to either eliminate or fortify the vampires. not so brilliant actually. additionally, they all featured stores of blood, either in body farms or the standard blood bags. i'm almost getting tired of the biological warfare trend in action films. plus the fighting scenes were woefully unoriginal and not even all that well-executed.
in other news, some company's bottling tryptophan (i can't be bothered this morning to look up the spelling for that turkey compound) as a natural sleep aid. i think i'll stick with my hallucination inducing ambien, thanks.
I think there's often something to be said for Potential that you just let be Potential and don't rush to go anywhere with. I find it's nice to know there's potential out there, but not feel impelled to turn it into Something (and often, when you attempt to create Something out of Potential, it all goes to hell and you have neither, or end up with something you don't want anyway)
Posted by: meara | Monday, 30 July 2007 at 12:47